Haven’t we all been blessed by the selfless efforts and service of our beloved bishops? It remains remarkable to me that God calls good but imperfect men to perform such incredible and invaluable service.
I remember hearing that shortly after being released as a General Authority, Elder Jacob de Jager was called as a bishop in downtown Salt Lake City. He was asked by one of the brethren how he enjoyed his change in assignment. He jokingly responded, “ I have learned that every position above a bishop is just talk”.
Now we all know that is not true, however I appreciated the fact that serving in the trenches as a bishop is truly where the rubber meets the road. The demands are high and that is why I have often heard from others in jest that a bishop is the best calling to have ever had. On the contrary, I found serving as a bishop to be truly one of the greatest times of my life and in the life of my young family. Little wonder in God's wisdom he chooses to share the experience with another family every 5 years.
I was tutored well, serving as counselor to 4 bishops in the span of 11 years. After serving as a bishop myself, I was called to the stake High Council with an assignment to put together a new bishops training program. This afforded me a reason to contact and interview many bishops, past and present to develop tools that might help newly called bishops shorten the learning curve and hit the road running. My plans are to post these ministering tools in this section of the blog called Beloved Bishops. My hope is that these tried and proven “helps” might lighten the load of anyone presently serving. You great brethren and your families deserve all the help you can get.
First Tool-
Top 13 things most bishops say they wish they had known at the beginning of their service.
1. Wisdom in Councils- Brethren think differently than sisters. Ask trusted sister leaders for ideas, suggestions and feedback on anything that effects the ward family before initiating action or change.
2. Better warm than cold- It is better to error on the side of keeping our buildings too warm than too cool. Remember priesthood leaders, you always wear a suite coat, women and children don’t. David Letterman claims he keeps his studio cold to help keep the comedy fresh. Nothing is funny about our sisters being cold at church.
3. Say What? Error on being too loud rather than too soft. Nothing is more frustrating to the elderly than to attend a meeting they can not hear. In the chapel make the effort to move the pulpit, adjust the microphone and adjust the volume for each speaker. When conducting reverence doesn't have to mean we speak softly, it's improtant to be heard so speak up!
4. Two ears vs. one mouth. President Packer has continually taught that a bishop is to listen first, particularly in counseling sessions. Many times, members will discover answers to their own dilemmas once they hear themselves express them to a trusted bishop. Bishops don’t have to “fix” everything, often they simply need to be a listening ear and direct their members to the Lord.
5. Welfare- The church’s welfare program is built to sustain life, not lifestyles. Once established however, if basic needs are not being met, President Monson told bishops if they are to error, error on the side of generosity.
6. Youth need fewer critics and more heroes. Our youth will rise to the Lord’s expectations if given the tools, a testimony and the opportunity. Bishops cannot delegate being the president of the Priest quorum. Remeber to encourage, encourage, encourage.
7. Do-better talks. After a calling has been extended prayerfully, if the member does not magnify their calling nor meet expectations, have a “do-better” talk with them before considering a release. First find out if they where properly trainined and if not, apologize and insure it happens. Next, communicate expectations and encourage them to rise and fulfill the calling. Set a 4-6 week return and report session. If the member improves, great, if not, they will better understand the need for the release and may even welcome it.
8 Three Rules of Delegation- 1. Don't deligate and do it all yourself. 2. Delegate and accept the outcome whatever it may be. 3. (Best) Delegate the action required, the manner in which it is to be carried out and the outcome expected.
9. Communication- the goal is not just to be understood rather we should work to insure we are never misunderstood. That includes body language! Wave at everyone, shake all hands, smile, and stay awake on the stand.
10. Orchestrate Sacrament Meetings to be “worship services” rather than “programs”.
1. Plan talks and music that center on Christ and the Restoration.
2. Conduct a meeting with an investigator in mind. Be welcoming, try not to use “Mormon insider lingo".
3. Never underestimate the power of music & it’s ability to manifest the Spirit.
4. Call a member of the bishopric to be in charge of keeping the other two bishopric members awake on the stand.
11. Respect confidentiality. Members may even try to trick you or family members to find out what has been improperly shared. Ask permission before sharing private issues with anyone else.
12. Work your counselors. When first called, give them too much rather than too little to do. You can always pull back some responsibilities if needed but don’t let them think the job is light or easy at first or it will be difficult to expect more of them later.
13. Minister vs. Administer- Spend more time ministering and less time administrating. Talking with members in their homes shows your love more than talking about them in meetings.
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